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If “Love is a Losing Game,” why do we keep playing?

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One day, while waiting for Monkey #3 (The Girl Child) to finish ballet rehearsal, I decided I needed some “Mommy Monkey Time.”  So, I grabbed a cup of coffee, a good book, and my ear buds and headed to a park.  Ahhhh…peace and quiet and stillness – just what I needed!

I found a nice bench, under an old pecan tree, pulled up Spotify, found just the right station, opened my book and waited for my brain to be still.

Mission accomplished!  That is until “Love is a Losing Game” by the late Amy Winehouse came up.  At first, I let the easy, bluesy, soulful sound wash over me – that is until I started paying attention to the lyrics…

For you I was a flame,
Love is a losing game
Five story fire as you came,
Love is losing game

One I wish I never played,
Oh, what a mess we made
And now the final frame,
Love is a losing game

Wait a minute.  Is that true?!?  Is LOVE really a losing game?!?

Oh God, I hope not!  How depressing!  Surely, SURELY that can’t be true!

Can it?!

Played out by the band,
Love is a losing hand
More than I could stand,
Love is a losing hand

Self professed profound
Til’ the chips were down
Know you’re a gambling man
Love is a losing hand

Oh, my.  Maybe she is right.  I mean, on one hand, (the losing hand) I have never been in a love relationship – a “romantic” one that is – that hasn’t ended.  Even those where I thought that at long last (after going into double overtime) the game was finally over – that Team Love WON!

So, if we know that love is a losing game, why then do we continue to BEG the coach to put us in the game?  Doesn’t it seem like we are simply setting ourselves up for another entry in the loss column in the Game of Love?

In the past 12 years, the Detroit Lions have lost about 140 games out of around 200 games.  They have only won 30% of their football games this century.  That includes a total of 18 losses IN A ROW – spanning 3 seasons.  However, I am pretty sure that every time they took the field they thought they stood a chance at winning.  They never just called the NFL and said, “You know, we really REALLY suck.  How about we just stop playing?”  Nope.  They suited up, and ran out there and PLAYED.  Oh, sure.  Most likely they will lose.  I mean, look at those stats!  But, they still played.

Love is that kind of game.  No matter how many times we lose, we continue to suit up and play.

No matter how much the stats may suck.

No matter how EPIC some of the losses might have been.

We still suit up and play.

Maybe I am an eternal optimist.  Or, maybe I’m just deluded.  Who knows.  But, isn’t a good thing to not want to give up?  Isn’t it a bad thing to throw the game?  And isn’t it even worse to not play just because you are afraid you are going to lose?

I’d like to think so.  But, maybe that’s just me.

Who knows?  Maybe the next season will be a winning one – and I’ll take it all the way to the Super Bowl.

(Please feel free to groan at the sports metaphors.  I know I did as I was writing!)

“Love is a Losing Game”  from the album Back to Black (2006) Music and Lyrics by Amy Winehouse


About Susan D.

Single mother of three. Teacher. Amateur Jewelry Designer. Singer. Hack writer. Trying to keep sane - as well as I can.

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